The Nature of Relationship

We need each other. We need to be needed, as much as we need others. In fact, some counselors suggest the greatest human need is the need to be needed. Commonly called "the search for significance," most of us find great satisfaction in the relationships we build and maintain with people we genuinely care about.

It shouldn't be at all surprising that we so highly value relationships. We were created for relationship. God created us for fellowship with Him. He recognized the longing within man for relationship, and created a help-mate for him, from him. We really are connected to each other, and to God. Our innermost longings can only be satisfied in relationships. And our greatest, aching, innermost longing is for God. Our search for significance is really a search for Him.

Some worry the search is in vain. Some fear that the search is futile, contending "there is no God." But Jesus said that everyone who keeps searching will find. The garden story, at the very beginning of the Bible, tells of God searching for Adam & Eve, after their sin. I believe the life and sacrifice of Christ is the ultimate story of God searching for us. He wants a relationship with us. We need only reach up to Him. He's already reaching out to us.

We were created for fellowship with God. He gave us the capacity to participate in relationship with Him, in an intelligent, loving fashion. As a result, we have the capacity, also, to participate in relationship with other people. In fact, the capacity to love and be loved, to hear and be heard--or perhaps better stated, to understand and be understood, to accept and be accepted, are perhaps the most common and important human traits.

While most of us search for interpersonal relationships to meet our needs, many are unaware that the single greatest fulfillment available in human experience is found in a personal relationship with God. Many find it completely normal to talk to ourselves, but may find it a little uncomfortable for others to know they talk to an invisible, quiet God. Like the discomfort of conversation with someone you just met for the first time, or perhaps that of a first date, the only way to make it work is to just do it.

Talk to God. Take the chance of not knowing what to say. Take the chance that some may think you're psychotic. Take the chance that He will hear you. He will listen. He will care. He will respond.

"I see the grass growing in your path..."

In his book "Chazown," Craig Groeschel (pastor of LifeChurch in Oklahoma) tells the story of African Christians who, when the gospel first came to them, valued prayer above all "religious" disciplines. They actually built private prayer huts, with each Hut set apart for just one person, and the path used only by that person leading up to its door. If someone neglected the loving discipline of prayer, grass would begin to grow on the path. The straying brother or sister's best friends were the ones with the courage to say, "I love you, and I see the grass growing on your path." In other words, I love you enough to correct you. You are not doing what God has called you to do.

Given that prayer is our direct-connect to God, the method whereby our entire success as a disciple of Christ is realized, the importance cannot be overstated. Prayer is the lifeblood of the believer. It is the moment of private worship, wherein we lay ourselves before our almighty God, paying homage, honor, and respect, in the small fashion we can. It is the source of our wisdom, to be able to see things through the eyes of God. It is the source of our strength, to be able to endure, persist, and to accomplish all things, up to and including the impossible. It is the source of our power, to be able to call into play the mighty God Who can, when we cannot. Prayer is Christianity. How can we neglect so important an endeavor? And yet, we do.

Who loves you enough to point out the overgrown paths in your life? Who will hold you accountable with your New Year's resolutions--with your resolve to follow Christ, above all else? Is there grass in your path?

With all your heart, soul, strength and mind

The basics of Christianity are pretty simple and straightforward--Jesus is the Christ, the son of the one true God, whose sacrifice covers the sin of any who will follow Him as faithful disciples. He calls us to follow Him, keeping His commandments, living as He lived, living as He lives within us. His commandments: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, strength and mind. Love your neighbor as yourself. His example: Do not condemn people--not even the guilty. Be gracious. Give yourself completely for the redemption of others. Giving is the reward (nothing is more fulfilling).


The basics are simple and straightforward. They are also virtually impossible. The Holy Spirit of Christ living in us makes us like Him, making it possible to keep His commandments. We do the discipline, but using His power, His strength, having His mind. But how?


We ask.


If we ask, He makes us new. Not just once, but every time. It's called prayer.


We were created for fellowship with God. Christians are creatures of prayer, by prayer, for prayer. We cannot exist without it. We cannot persist without it. We cannot even come close to the standard, except by prayer, putting us in close proximity with God where we are changed. Again, and again, and again.


Prayer is the conversation we have with God. But it's so much more. It's the secret to the Christian life.